Denim Musings for Spring

While winter rages on for some of us, most retailers are in full-on "Woo-hoo, it's Spring!" mode.  Never mind that my car's tilted at a 10 degree angle, the right side propped up on about 6 inches of what was once freshly fallen snowflakes and is now a weeks-old rocky formation of frozen snow, slush, ice, dirt, sand, and probably a present left by the neighborhood dog.

Anyway, among the swimsuits, sundresses, and strappy sandals up for purchase, the parade of denim shorts has begun as well.  While there are a few cute options, I'm still "SMH"-ing at a few items.

For example, Revolve loves a brand called One Teaspoon, who has a whole line of jean shorts in different colors but the same style.  The style being this:

Really?  I don't care if it's plaid, has leopard spots, or comes in classic blue.  Still looks like...  something I wouldn't wear.

Shopbop is fully on the jean shorts train as well.  This pair from Alice + Olivia runs maybe a wee bit short for my old gams, but I like the simple, tailored cut:

On the other hand, this style doesn't seem to fall in the "flattering" category:

Is it 1993 and I missed the memo?  It's not so much the length, but the boxy-a$$ cut.  I mean, check out the back:

Just seems like if you want to accentuate a large bottom, this is the way to do it.  And most chicks I know are trying hard not to do that.  If I'm going to don a pair of these things, I might as well fire up my Deee-Lite CD on my JVC "boombox."

For those of us not basking in 70 degree weather (and this currently includes South Carolina, where I used to work), here are some longer options that still make me wrinkle my nose like I just passed a dead skunk on Interstate 77.

It's like you're wearing short-shorts, but with pants.  Tight leather pants:

Rear view.  It perplexes:

I dunno.  Maybe it's perfect for the club.  Like, the one I will probably never set foot in.


And these just seem like there's one zipper too many:

I guess this works if I want to get in a street fight.  All that metalwork can hurt, you know, when you want to knee someone in the gut.  But the massive number of spiky shoes on the market seems like a more effective weapon.

Well, you'll have to let me know if you like any of these offerings.  I'm sure they work for some people, and wouldn't it be boring if we all liked and disliked the same stuff?  This was a good lesson my grandma taught me.  And I carry it, as well as her memory, close to my heart.  Are you adoring the crazy frayed Daisy Dukes?  By all means, have at it!  I'll stick with my CoH Ava's.

Getting away from the denim, how's the whole Prabal Gurung for Target working out for those of you who shopped the collab?  I've now tried on all the shoes and clothes I ordered.  I'll give a report on that shortly, but I can tell you some stuff didn't make the cut.  What was your experience?  Keeping that dress?  Returning the shorts?  Shoes too large?

Do share.  Til then, I'll be enjoying temperatures above the single digits and some sunshine.  And dreaming of the day it'll be warm enough to wear shorts.  40 degrees isn't so far away after all...








Images:
#1 - revolve.com
Remainder - shopbop.com